It’s time for big, specific prayers
One of the quickest paths to holiness is the practice of uniting one’s own will to the will of God. Those who practice this don’t simply desire God’s will, but they desire it more than anything else – including their own longings and ideas. There are countless stories of saints who prayed not for healing, but for God to further inflict them with their illness for His greatest glory. Saints who joyfully embrace the sufferings and crosses that the Lord places on their shoulders. These saints are gallant, heroic, and holy. And for the past few weeks, I’ve tried to be one of them.
But as my prayers have been filled with, “God, I want whatever You want for me,” my relationship with the Lord has become distant. The honest desires and longings of my heart have been shoved in a corner as I’ve strived to live a holiness that is aspirational and, quite frankly, a long way from where I am now.
This week, I was sharing with a friend that I’ve been feeling particularly anxious and fearful about the future. She asked if I’d taken these fears to God, and I told her all about my “uniformity with God’s will” experience. With so much love and gentleness, she said, “Yes, wanting God’s will is a good thing, but that doesn’t mean you should hold back your specific, big, and true desires and longings from Him. He wants it all.”
I got off the phone and immediately opened my favorite live Adoration channel on YouTube, and brought my big, specific prayers to Jesus. I surprised even myself with how direct and honest I was. I told Jesus that I trusted Him to fulfill these deep longings of my heart, to respond out of the abundance of His goodness and grace. And, at the end of the prayer, I asked Him to grant me patience and joy as I await His promises, and increased trust that His plan is the absolute best thing for me.
The truth is that God’s will IS the very best thing for us. His perspective is so much greater than ours, and He sees everything. We are his beloved daughters (and sons, for the few men on this email!), and as our good, good father He loves us and knows us better than we love and know ourselves. To embrace His will, we must first accept His steadfast love and faithfulness. We must embrace a relationship of honesty and openness, even (especially) with the big stuff.
I invite you to take some time this week to visit the Blessed Sacrament in Adoration or a tabernacle, and bring your big, wild dreams to Jesus. Ask Him to purify these desires and to raise them up for His greatest glory. Then, sit back and watch Him work.
- For all the members of this community and their intentions!
- For a community member struggling with insomnia, and for all those struggling to sleep
- For a prayerful and faithful Lenten season
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Jane was born in Australia, raised in California, and is overjoyed to now call NYC home. She graduated from UCSB with degrees in Political Science and Communication and spent the past two years working in criminal justice reform. She is currently an MBA student at NYU Stern, focusing on entrepreneurship and strategy.