A place to rest
The Advent God gives us
“Christ asks for a home in your soul, where he can be at rest with you, where he can talk easily to you, where you and he, alone together, can laugh and be silent and be delighted with one another.”
Caryll Houselander, The Reed of God
When this quote popped up on my phone in a Hallow notification early yesterday morning, and it made my heart leap. “Ugh YES this is what I wanted my Advent to look like!!” How gorgeous that would be — and it was indeed my intention. But like most well laid plans… my Advent has not quite gone that way.
On one hand, mornings and evenings are going well, thanks to the book of Shorter Christian Prayer and Mother Mary Francis P.C.C.’s Meditations on the Art of Waiting which are both changing my life in the best way.
It’s just all of the moments between that morning and evening prayer which are not going to plan. Did no one get the memo that this was supposed to be my All Is Calm, All Is Bright Advent™?!
And I don’t think I’m alone!! Everyone I know is sprinting to the end of the year, fighting off (or succumbing to) some insane flu or cold, bouncing from holiday party to holiday party, truly all at the end of our ropes as clients and bosses and coworkers need everything right now please and thank you.
This glorious (albeit slightly dramatically titled) rosary reflection popped up on my Substack this week, and I had some incredible prayer with it on Saturday. It’s a gorgeous reflection on the reality that even the Joyful mysteries of the Rosary were shrouded in darkness. Yes, Mary said yes to God — but that yes was followed by darkness as she walked in faith without seeing. She went to visit Elizabeth, a long journey that would have been harrowing for anyone, let alone a young pregnant woman. The birth of Jesus was far from ideal — the Holy Family was without safe shelter and she labored in a dark and dirty cave. As Mary brought Jesus to the temple, Simeon prophesied his greatness and told Mary that a sword would pierce her heart. And of course, the final mystery — Mary and Joseph lost Jesus (Son of God, fyi) for THREE days! Pretty dramatic for “joyful” mysteries.
And yet — these mysteries are joyful. They begin in darkness and burst into the light. (I really do recommend spending time with this reflection).
And that is I think the real invitation of Advent. Everywhere I turn there is a new homily all about seeds and rains and waiting and endurance and I’m listening to them and thinking, “Hmm, yes, what good points,” but I don’t particularly want them to relate to me. But they do — they relate to all of us. All of us are enduring or suffering or waiting for something. It looks different in different moments or for different people, but that is the way of life. As my Advent book says, “We all want to suffer something for God, but we just can’t understand why suffering makes us suffer.”
If this Advent has taught me anything, it’s that I cannot do this on my own. I need Jesus. And I have always known that, rationally, but these past few weeks have had me going back to Him and truly begging Him to come and pour out deeper levels of joy and trust and hope — O Come, O Come Emmanuel has a fresh new meaning this Advent.
And He responds. He comes. He loves me through little sparkles of light that strengthen me moment by moment. He makes known that He is always near, He is always listening and responding and sustaining me.
So once again, it’s not the liturgical season I planned, but it sure is the one that the Lord sees fit to give me. And who am I to question His goodness in that? I’m just a little daughter and He is a good father.
One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned this year is that God wants us to ask Him for things. The more we give Him, the more we receive. And a big part of building this intimacy with God is the importance of growing in honesty: with myself and with God. If we aren’t honest with ourselves, it’s nearly impossible to be honest with Him. Without honesty, our intimacy with God gets blocked. I don’t know where you are in your walk with Him, but I do think all of us could benefit from being a little more truthful, especially with the One who already sees everything.
As we come to the end of the year, I encourage all of us to make space to be honest before God. Adoration is my favorite place for this, but if you can’t get to a chapel, find some time in silence (preferably somewhere beautiful) and speak openly with Him. Hold nothing back. He never holds back with us. And when we’re honest, He can respond fully, generously, completely.
He is the God of generosity and the God of hope! Everything He strips away prepares the fertile ground for new life. And that’s the whole promise of Advent: a season of preparation, of loosening our grip on how we think life or this liturgical season “should” be, so we can freely, joyfully, totally receive the gift God longs to give us: Himself, completely, as a baby in a manger.
Light, in the dark.
In Christ,
Jane
What I’m loving lately
Living vicariously through my parents’ trip to Paris and Rome
Look at this INSANE picture my mom got of Pope Leo after his Mass on the Feast of Our Lady of Guadalupe. Incredible.
The Eras Tour Documentary
Let me just admit that I loved these first two episodes so much. I absolutely love anything behind the scenes and this docuseries on Taylor Swift’s epic world tour is (of course) incredibly well done. It’s such a happy, boppy, fun watch! She works so dang hard. An inspiration to use the gifts and talents God gives us!
The goal and dream
I saw this quote this week and thought, “Yup - that’s the goal”
May this season of Advent be for all of us the beginning of the end of all things that are not Christ.
Oof. Come, Jesus.
Pray for Australia. Pray for Brown University. Pray pray pray.
The heaviness of this weekend has been felt. I’m so sad about the events in my beloved Bondi Beach — a place that brought me unbelievable joy during my two months in Sydney earlier this year. This violence hurts. Lord have mercy.
Prayer intentions
For victims of violence and for peace in the hearts and minds of those who are troubled
For all those celebrating Hannukah
For a special intention