In seventh grade, my social studies class was assigned a project in which we had to design and create a traditional West African tribal mask1 . It was for our World Cultures section and involved researching ancient designs, colors, and themes.
As per usual, I went all out. My mother had a stash of plaster rolls, so I stuck straws in my nose and we plastered my face, then I took the cast of my face and hand painted it with the most authentic patterns and colors I could muster. That project likely took an entire weekend, and I’m sure involved a whole lot of stress and maybe even tears, as I panicked about how to keep my delicate mask safe from the hands of my wild younger brothers and all the way to school unscathed.
On the project due date, I showed up with my mask cradled in my hands, wrapped in a towel, excited and ready to submit. My classmate sat down next to me and whipped her own mask out of a folder in her backpack. “Wow, that’s intense,” she commented as she looked at my mask. “I just cut the edges off a paper plate and used markers.”
We turned in our masks. We both got A’s.
The lesson here was one I continue to learn almost 20 years later: It’s important to recognize when effort will make something better, or when it will just make it harder.
I love to build, design, and create. I am a big goal / big idea / big dream girl. But the challenge of those big ideas and big dreams is that I often want them to be exactly what I had in mind — to bring the visions I have to life. Many times, this turns out well: a Survivor-themed birthday party, a wallpapered Parisian bathroom, a girls trip for which everyone had to prepare a PowerPoint of their year to share. But sometimes, if the big idea/big dream isn't going to come to life to my expectations, I don’t want to do it at all.
A few months ago, a mentor gave me advice on how to manage my team: “Jane, you don’t have time for your idea of perfect. You need to decide if the team’s work is good enough, and if so, let them run with it. You’ll be so grateful you did.”
And she was totally right. My idea of perfect can get in the way of something just as good (or often even better):
My ideal is hosting a three-course meal for my friends, complete with a tablescape (including homemade ice cream). Good enough is Emmy Squared pizza around my coffee table, people crammed on the couch, catching up.
My ideal is flowers and a handwritten thank you card, mailed moments after the act of generosity. Good enough is a call, a voice memo, a DoorDash flower bouquet.
My ideal is three hours to catch up with a friend over dinner. Good enough is a 20-minute call on the way home from work.
My ideal is a 30-minute French lesson, with a few more minutes to review flashcards. Good enough is 10 minutes of a French podcast in my ears as I clean up after dinner.
My ideal is a full holy hour in front of a monstrance. Good enough is stopping in the midst of a chaotic day and offering up a prayer to remind myself that I’m not in it alone — God is in charge.
I love Gretchen Rubin, who speaks often about the importance of knowing ourselves. One thing I know about myself is that I like things done with excellence, but sometimes the plates are too full for the level of “excellence” I want. In those instances, I can either give up totally or deliver what is necessary, the “good enough,” and move forward.
My friend Nicole told me years ago, “Do your best and God will do the rest,” and it is so true. When I get overwhelmed by my vision for how I want things to play out, I lose sight of the reality that God is in charge, that His strength is made perfect in my weakness. When I do my best, maintain my peace, and get out of the way, He moves mountains.
Is there anything you’re holding out on because you’re afraid of something less than ideal? What could you get done if you embraced “good enough” this week? How could it make your world (and your life) a bit bigger, freer, and more joyful? God is full of surprises!
In Christ,
Jane
What I’m loving lately
Monk Mindset: New Series!
I am such a fan of John and Colette and everyone at Monk Mindset for how they are bringing ancient wisdom into the working world — and I was delighted to collaborate on their latest series, “Work and Prayer.” It’s 25 days of prayers and reflections on how to bring prayer into your work and life, led by monks, nuns, and me (one of these things is not like the other, but I’m happy to be in their company!) You can check it out now on Monk Mindset, through a free trial or by using code JANE for 20% off an annual membership!
Hand cream obsession
My friend Emma came back from Paris a few months ago with this Caudalie hand and nail cream, and I used it every night religiously until every drop was gone. I was delighted to find it at Sephora to restock! It’s my favorite nighttime routine and keeps my hands so moisturized and happy.
Change of plans
Last week I shared that I was excited to head to Kauai for the wedding of my friends, Julianna and Jonathon. However, a hurricane knocked out the power and the roads on the island, and they sadly had to postpone. Please keep them in your prayers, as they navigate this unexpected change of plans! It's very sad to see Kauai in that state and it sounds like the island is recovering well. The silver lining was that the change of plans meant I got to visit my best friend Erica in San Diego and enjoy a couple of days at the beach, which I was very grateful for!
A very good conversation
I have never once listened to Theo Von but I loved this conversation he had with Bishop Barron. I listened to the whole thing! I think Theo’s questions were so humble and direct, and Bishop Barron is just the best person for something like this because he simply knows everything.
The simplicity of the Psalms
This weekend I was able to get some great prayer time in and I truly adored the chance to rest in the Psalms. They are so simple and deep and good. I spent time in Psalm 16, Psalm 19 and Psalm 33. If you’re ever stuck in prayer, they’re a great place to go!
Why I love DC
At work this morning I was looking out the window of my favorite office, simply overcome by how much I love this city. And this evening, I walked into mass where there was a large to-do happening — I asked my friend what was happening and he told me that the Prince and Princess of Ethiopia were there for Mass! What a wild time. This city never gets old.
Prayer intentions
For a special intention
Not sure if this is still an appropriate project? This was 2008…